Lately

This song is all over the place and I don’t think that I’ve ever written one that was so here, there, and everywhere. Hell I’m not even sure whether or not I like this song… As a matter of fact I think I hate it; however my mind seems to be blank yet another time for an idea for a blog topic. So I’ve decided to put this song up that I can’t stand for the heck of it, man I feel like I’m gonna regret this.

 

I’ve been feeling in a rut lately because it seems like everything has been so repetitive lately. Been working on my story and blog like crazy, although I sometimes I feel like I’m not posting quite as often as I should be. For the past two weeks I’ve only posted four articles and it’s usually twice that amount, plus two more along with it.

I swear that my mind’s been everywhere lately, from working on my craft to reminiscing of the old days, back in CO with my best friend Caity. We used to be so in touch but it seems like my years away plus the distance not to mention our own responsibilities have led us astray. Damn I miss those days. The summer of 2010 was one of the best even though it was crazy hectic. It makes me miss nineteen and twenty but then again I’ve really missed years fifteen and up. You know as a teen I always use to roll my eyes when people said that these are the best years you’ll have and you’re really gonna miss em. Now that I’m older and slightly wiser I get it, and you wanna know something? They were right I do miss em.

Lately my heart’s been pining uncontrollably, just thinking about that first love that was in the mix of those best years that I miss so badly. Wishing I could bring myself to talk to that person but I can’t bring myself to do so. Why you might be wondering; cause it’s a complicated situation that has been all over the map throughout the years. From my angle it doesn’t look like it’ll be getting better anytime soon, so I’ll just drop the subject.

For a while now I’ve wanted to bust out some new love song however the only songs that have come to mind were two break up songs and three hip-hop songs which revolved around my insane childhood. I don’t know what’s been up with my urge to write so many hip-hop songs recently, I could possibly be burned out from writing so much pop; but who the hell knows I guess it’s just the way I’ve been feeling lately.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my career too; just wondering if I might have a decent story ready for publication in a year or two, I’m hoping that I’d be able to sell a winner too. It’d be nice to get that first deal and to hit that first tour. I’d just like to know that feeling. You know I use to say that I’m so close to my dream that I can taste it, now I’m just hoping that I will be able to see that light at the end of the tunnel. But for right now I’m still walking around in the dark. Please can somebody hit the light switch?

I know and do realize that this song has been all over the place but you’ll have to forgive me, this is just what’s been rolling around in my head lately.

 

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5 thoughts on “Lately

  1. The amount of bumps I’ve had, I think we are all in the dark bluffing our way through like we know stuff. Take heart, you aren’t alone, life has a funny way of focusing you though…I had no focus for years but recently I am that way…life is odd.

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    1. Well it’s good to know that I’m not the only one with an issue keeping focus. I’m glad to see that you’ve found it though.
      Thanks for your words they’re always appreciated.

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  2. So far, from what i can see you are a talented writer and have a natural ability to express through writing. You’ll make it. Consistency, perseverance and giving to help others are all keys to success in my opinion! 😀

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